but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Welp...herpes.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
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