He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
