She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize