porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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