So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I understand Curling. That high.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
