I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
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