We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
