you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
