But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
