Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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