: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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