We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize