Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
