Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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