New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
