Define "chronic" masturbator.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
