the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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