We won't sleep together?
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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