It's like a parade of train wrecks.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
