he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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