what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize