So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
