quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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