remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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