I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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