note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
