I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
