susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
