yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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