im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize