You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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