fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
So many bounce houses so little time
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
So vagazzling was a success
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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