Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
