There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize