The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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