Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
