i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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