Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
