White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
