I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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