piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
