3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
