He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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