I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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