he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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