I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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