How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
