he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
