White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
