just come out here and I will go home with you...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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