i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize